Three Men and a Little Lady

Remember that  movie?    Well, change the little lady to a puppy and subtract a man, and that's what life's been like for the last couple of months.

Ginger is sickeningly cute, and growing so fast.  She had her second vet visit yesterday for her third round of shots.  She's now 30 lbs. about about 18" tall at the shoulder.  I said I'd never buy clothes for a dog,  I even made fun of many an unfortunate pet that was clothed by it's owner.  Today I did it.  I bought Ginger a wool lined suede jacket.  There's something wrong with me.    I saw it while walking through a thrift store and had to buy it.  I'm not going to post pictures of her wearing it, though, because I think that would add insult to injury.

The last 2 months with a puppy have been fun, but challenging.  We've both locked ourselves out during middle-of-the-night trips outside.  We've cleaned up lots and lots of puppy poop and pee.  Two of my colleagues have young children, and I have a new-found sympathy for them.  I thought it'd be fun to do a puppy/baby comparison.

Puppy:  You have to walk outside in the cold, rain, or snow so it can poo, pee, or just frolic in the grass to frustrate you.

Baby: Poos and pees in diapers.  Needs frequent cleaning, but not terribly urgent if you don't mind that smell.

Puppy:  You can dump some food/water in a couple of bowls and proceed to scramble your eggs and brew coffee while it eats.

Baby: Best case scenario - you go to the fridge and get some recently pumped breast milk.  Worst case scenario - it hangs off your chest, chewing on your nipples until it's full.

Puppy: You can teach to fetch and retrieve.  Can get shoes, newspaper, find drugs and bombs, and even assist handicapped people (or are they still called "differently-abled"?)

Baby: Wait years and you might be able to convince it to do household chores.  It'll likely do them with little reliability and only when bribed with an allowance or under threat of punishment.  This arrangement will break down in the teenage years when it's no longer cool to help, be seen with, or even acknowledge the existence of mom and dad. 

Puppy: May scratch or bite you.  May destroy or eat any or all of the following: homework, shoes, phonebook, furniture, carpet, or landscaping.

Baby: May scratch or bite you.  May destroy or eat any or all of the following: homework, shoes, phonebook, furniture, carpet, or landscaping.   (when grown) Will never drive "safe enough" as far as you're concerned.  Will never raise their children the way you'd want them too.  Would likely not marry someone you deemed "good enough."  May not give your the grandchildren your really hoping for, or may give you grandchildren before they graduate high school.  

Puppy: Puppy class, clicker, unlimited supply of treats.

Baby: Preschool, public school or private?, PTA or PTO, school dances, bake sales, parent- teacher conferences.  Band, Dance, Cheer leading, Wrestling, Football, Soccer, and/or 4-H.  Prom, senior pictures, and graduation.  College, student loans, changing majors x times, graduate school.

SCORE

Puppy - 4

Baby - 1

In other news, I had to go to Wichita to fix a sink in my house that had been broken.  That sucked.  Funny part, however, was that the plastic bolts were completely stuck under the sink (I found that out after taking out the whole sink and trying to remove the faucet.)  They were completely immovable.  I didn't know of a better way to remove them, so Dr. Smith's amazing Swedish valve oil (T-2) came to the rescue.  He didn't invent it or anything, but he is a huge fan of it... it is really good stuff, after all.  I'm still waiting to see him on a late night TV infomercial (alla Ron Popeil) selling little bottles of the stuff for the LOW, LOW, PRICE OF $19.95. 

Anyway, I soaked the plastic bolts with the valve oil and set them on fire.  They melted and fell off.  Handy, huh?  Here's a picture of them all ablaze:

We are currently getting our first real snow.  I hate snow.  I also can't stand Nancy Grace.  Do you ever watch her show and wish it was her body the police were searching for?  ummm... yeah... me either.